Jared walked into the house he once called home and a surge of emotions flooded his soul. He fought the urge to return Caleb’s call instead he decided he would fly out to his childhood home after he returned from his trip.
He was not in the least moved by anything but relief and annoyance when he heard the disappointment in Jesse’s voice. She would be there alone to entertain her parents but at least his excuse was reasonable and could not be counted as a scapegoat.
Jared searched through the crowd and saw his brother Caleb leaned up against the mantle. Jared stopped for a moment at the sight of his brother’s forlorn body which seemed almost lifeless. He knew when he pulled up what had happened by all the cars and the individuals dressed in black and crying. His father was gone.
Jared felt the worst slap of anger hit him. This time it was because he didn’t get here in time enough to ask his father why. Jared wanted to know why his father and Caleb felt it necessary to hold his mother’s illness from him all that time as though he were a helpless child. Jared was just as much of a man as Caleb was at the time.
Jared moved across the room to his brother and although he stood directly in front of him it was as though Caleb didn’t see him. Jared placed a hand on Caleb’s shoulder. Jared could see the pain in Caleb’s eyes as he looked up into Jared’s.
Caleb flung his arms around Jared and held on as though Jared were Caleb’s lifeline. Jared stood motionless for a minute or two with his arms firmly at his side. Caleb released his hold and looked up into Jared’s eyes with pools of water threatening to fall down his face.
“Jared dad is gone…I hoped you…” Caleb dragged on painfully.
“Daddy…daddy…I have to potty.” Hannah said pulling on Caleb’s pants leg.
Caleb reached down and picked Hannah up and looked around for Sharon. Sharon was already staring in their direction. Caleb motioned for Sharon to come closer. Sharon walked closer tightly grasping Jennifer’s hand. Caleb reached Hannah to Sharon.
“Hannah has to potty.” Sharon took Hannah and was about to turn away when Caleb continued, “Sharon I want you to meet my brother Jared.”
Sharon nodded. Jared looked at Sharon holding Hannah in his arms and then back at Caleb.
“Jared this is my wife Sharon and our daughter Hannah.” Caleb said erasing the curious look off of Jared’s face.
Sharon held Hannah close and walked away leaving as Jared’s eyes were glued to Hannah. Jennifer stood feeling out of place and helpless as she shifted slightly from one foot to the other.“Well I uhh…will leave you two alone.” Jennifer said as she turned to leave. Jared’s eyes darted to her and were about to turn away when he noticed she looked somewhat familiar. Not just that alone but she was captivating so much so that he almost had a hard time swallowing.
“I’m sorry Jennifer…this is my brother Jared…Jared this is Jennifer. She moved in next door when mom died.” Caleb faltered off.
“Hi.” Jennifer said as she reached out her hand in an attempt to be polite. She really didn’t have much to say to a man who would leave his family and only return when it was somewhat too late. She shouldn’t be thinking this way. It was not in her nature to judge another human being that was God’s job.
Jennifer had no idea why but standing in close proximity with Jared brought about an uncomfortable nervousness that she not only never experienced before but wanted to escape from.
Jared stood captivated by her. He could see her outstretched hand but his brain didn’t send the necessary commands to move his hand towards hers. He could see her lowering her hand uncomfortably to her side. What an idiot he was to leave a beautiful woman standing there like that.
“Well I’m just going to go uhh…” Jennifer said as she looked in the other room where a group was gathered, “I’ll see you later.” Jennifer said and hastily left as Jared stared off behind her.
Jared returned his attention to Caleb when Jennifer disappeared out of sight.
“You named her after mom.” Jared said quietly.
Caleb seemed to become a bit more alert at Jared’s observation. Caleb nodded his head in response.
“She has mom’s eyes.” Jared said in thought remembering the small girl in Sharon’s arms.
“I know.” Caleb said now his attention fully on Jared.
“I’m sorry you didn’t get to see dad before…”
“It’s alright. Probably wouldn’t have went well anyway…it was as it should be…he didn’t need to be upset by seeing me…this way was better at least he was at peace I’m sure.” Jared said in an attempt to hold back his anger.
“Jared he wanted to see you. He knew you’d never forgiven him…us…about mom.” Caleb said.
“I don’t want to talk about that now.” Jared dismissed him with his hand “Then what do you want to talk about Jared?” Caleb asked mustering up his own anger. “Look I got your message…came down when I could but I was too late so there’s nothing for me to say.” Jared said in his defense.
“You know what Jared you can go on blaming dad and me for mom but it was her decision…not ours to keep her illness from you. You only want a reason to be angry and you just can’t bring yourself to be angry at mom.” Caleb retorted
Jared could feel his temperature rising. He balled his fists at his side to keep from exploding into an uncontrollable rage. Jared could see Caleb’s eyes fall to his side.
“The same old Jared ready to explode at the slightest thing. You never could control your emotions, which is exactly why mom didn’t want you to know.” Caleb said.
Jared resisted the urge to respond. Instead he turned and bolted out the front door nearly knocking over a small child playing in the front of the house. Jared didn’t look down to see what he nearly trampled he only wanted away from there as fast as possible.
Without thinking Jared turned into the Blue Hill Graveyard. Mindlessly he walked to his mother’s grave and fell to his knees. He sank his hands deep into the dirt. Anger and pain bubbled on the inside threatened to spill over.
As Caleb’s words of not being able to control his emotions stained Jared’s mind he breathed in and out carefully in an attempt to regain his control. Jared slowly pulled his hands from the dirt. There were no words he could express although he wanted nothing more than to pour his heart to his mother as he did in his younger years. The anger and the pain that controlled his emotions would not let him speak. He was about to rise when he noticed a fresh headstone next to his mother’s. It was his father’s. Jared balled his fists tight and without reading what was etched on the stone marched to his car, got in and sped off in anger.
****
Jennifer had only heard of men such as Jared but never actually met them. She was appalled as she stood by the window watching the children play outside when Jared came storming out of the house nearly knocking down little Andrew. He didn’t so much as turn around to see if the boy was okay. Thank goodness little Andrew is nothing but a rascal and used to hard hits and recovery. Still it was no excuse as Jennifer watched Jared speed off into his car.
“Where is he?” Sharon asked as Jennifer turned from the window to see her friend.
“He’s gone.” Jennifer said with protection laced in her voice.
“Caleb is even more upset than when he came…why’d he have to come here if he was just going to cause more pain.” Sharon asked.
“I’m sorry Sharon…come here.” Jennifer said taking Sharon into her arms and holding her tightly.
“I really hope he doesn’t come back.” Sharon sobbed on Jennifer’s shoulder.Jennifer couldn’t help but pray for the same thing. She had no idea how anyone could be so inconsiderate and have no feelings for the family that raised him. And the way he stood there gazing at her sent chills through her entire being. Jared Morrison was none other than a man that had a disturbed view of emotional reality.
Jennifer held onto Sharon as she prayed to never see Jared Morrison again.
He was not in the least moved by anything but relief and annoyance when he heard the disappointment in Jesse’s voice. She would be there alone to entertain her parents but at least his excuse was reasonable and could not be counted as a scapegoat.
Jared searched through the crowd and saw his brother Caleb leaned up against the mantle. Jared stopped for a moment at the sight of his brother’s forlorn body which seemed almost lifeless. He knew when he pulled up what had happened by all the cars and the individuals dressed in black and crying. His father was gone.
Jared felt the worst slap of anger hit him. This time it was because he didn’t get here in time enough to ask his father why. Jared wanted to know why his father and Caleb felt it necessary to hold his mother’s illness from him all that time as though he were a helpless child. Jared was just as much of a man as Caleb was at the time.
Jared moved across the room to his brother and although he stood directly in front of him it was as though Caleb didn’t see him. Jared placed a hand on Caleb’s shoulder. Jared could see the pain in Caleb’s eyes as he looked up into Jared’s.
Caleb flung his arms around Jared and held on as though Jared were Caleb’s lifeline. Jared stood motionless for a minute or two with his arms firmly at his side. Caleb released his hold and looked up into Jared’s eyes with pools of water threatening to fall down his face.
“Jared dad is gone…I hoped you…” Caleb dragged on painfully.
“Daddy…daddy…I have to potty.” Hannah said pulling on Caleb’s pants leg.
Caleb reached down and picked Hannah up and looked around for Sharon. Sharon was already staring in their direction. Caleb motioned for Sharon to come closer. Sharon walked closer tightly grasping Jennifer’s hand. Caleb reached Hannah to Sharon.
“Hannah has to potty.” Sharon took Hannah and was about to turn away when Caleb continued, “Sharon I want you to meet my brother Jared.”
Sharon nodded. Jared looked at Sharon holding Hannah in his arms and then back at Caleb.
“Jared this is my wife Sharon and our daughter Hannah.” Caleb said erasing the curious look off of Jared’s face.
Sharon held Hannah close and walked away leaving as Jared’s eyes were glued to Hannah. Jennifer stood feeling out of place and helpless as she shifted slightly from one foot to the other.“Well I uhh…will leave you two alone.” Jennifer said as she turned to leave. Jared’s eyes darted to her and were about to turn away when he noticed she looked somewhat familiar. Not just that alone but she was captivating so much so that he almost had a hard time swallowing.
“I’m sorry Jennifer…this is my brother Jared…Jared this is Jennifer. She moved in next door when mom died.” Caleb faltered off.
“Hi.” Jennifer said as she reached out her hand in an attempt to be polite. She really didn’t have much to say to a man who would leave his family and only return when it was somewhat too late. She shouldn’t be thinking this way. It was not in her nature to judge another human being that was God’s job.
Jennifer had no idea why but standing in close proximity with Jared brought about an uncomfortable nervousness that she not only never experienced before but wanted to escape from.
Jared stood captivated by her. He could see her outstretched hand but his brain didn’t send the necessary commands to move his hand towards hers. He could see her lowering her hand uncomfortably to her side. What an idiot he was to leave a beautiful woman standing there like that.
“Well I’m just going to go uhh…” Jennifer said as she looked in the other room where a group was gathered, “I’ll see you later.” Jennifer said and hastily left as Jared stared off behind her.
Jared returned his attention to Caleb when Jennifer disappeared out of sight.
“You named her after mom.” Jared said quietly.
Caleb seemed to become a bit more alert at Jared’s observation. Caleb nodded his head in response.
“She has mom’s eyes.” Jared said in thought remembering the small girl in Sharon’s arms.
“I know.” Caleb said now his attention fully on Jared.
“I’m sorry you didn’t get to see dad before…”
“It’s alright. Probably wouldn’t have went well anyway…it was as it should be…he didn’t need to be upset by seeing me…this way was better at least he was at peace I’m sure.” Jared said in an attempt to hold back his anger.
“Jared he wanted to see you. He knew you’d never forgiven him…us…about mom.” Caleb said.
“I don’t want to talk about that now.” Jared dismissed him with his hand “Then what do you want to talk about Jared?” Caleb asked mustering up his own anger. “Look I got your message…came down when I could but I was too late so there’s nothing for me to say.” Jared said in his defense.
“You know what Jared you can go on blaming dad and me for mom but it was her decision…not ours to keep her illness from you. You only want a reason to be angry and you just can’t bring yourself to be angry at mom.” Caleb retorted
Jared could feel his temperature rising. He balled his fists at his side to keep from exploding into an uncontrollable rage. Jared could see Caleb’s eyes fall to his side.
“The same old Jared ready to explode at the slightest thing. You never could control your emotions, which is exactly why mom didn’t want you to know.” Caleb said.
Jared resisted the urge to respond. Instead he turned and bolted out the front door nearly knocking over a small child playing in the front of the house. Jared didn’t look down to see what he nearly trampled he only wanted away from there as fast as possible.
Without thinking Jared turned into the Blue Hill Graveyard. Mindlessly he walked to his mother’s grave and fell to his knees. He sank his hands deep into the dirt. Anger and pain bubbled on the inside threatened to spill over.
As Caleb’s words of not being able to control his emotions stained Jared’s mind he breathed in and out carefully in an attempt to regain his control. Jared slowly pulled his hands from the dirt. There were no words he could express although he wanted nothing more than to pour his heart to his mother as he did in his younger years. The anger and the pain that controlled his emotions would not let him speak. He was about to rise when he noticed a fresh headstone next to his mother’s. It was his father’s. Jared balled his fists tight and without reading what was etched on the stone marched to his car, got in and sped off in anger.
****
Jennifer had only heard of men such as Jared but never actually met them. She was appalled as she stood by the window watching the children play outside when Jared came storming out of the house nearly knocking down little Andrew. He didn’t so much as turn around to see if the boy was okay. Thank goodness little Andrew is nothing but a rascal and used to hard hits and recovery. Still it was no excuse as Jennifer watched Jared speed off into his car.
“Where is he?” Sharon asked as Jennifer turned from the window to see her friend.
“He’s gone.” Jennifer said with protection laced in her voice.
“Caleb is even more upset than when he came…why’d he have to come here if he was just going to cause more pain.” Sharon asked.
“I’m sorry Sharon…come here.” Jennifer said taking Sharon into her arms and holding her tightly.
“I really hope he doesn’t come back.” Sharon sobbed on Jennifer’s shoulder.Jennifer couldn’t help but pray for the same thing. She had no idea how anyone could be so inconsiderate and have no feelings for the family that raised him. And the way he stood there gazing at her sent chills through her entire being. Jared Morrison was none other than a man that had a disturbed view of emotional reality.
Jennifer held onto Sharon as she prayed to never see Jared Morrison again.